Monday, April 27, 2009

Am I really here or is this just a dream?

I can never seem to completely justify that I am actually here and not just laying somewhere comatose in a bed dreaming this all up. Sometimes I feel like I have a completely different perspective on life then everyone else. Sometimes I just think that maybe I am crazy and some of the things that I think are happening in reality are really just happening in my head. I tend to day dream and stare off into space a lot and and come up with a different scenarios for every little thing that might happen to me that day or what might happen if I say different things to people then not remember if what i was thinking actually did happen or I was just thinking that it might happen. Occasionally I get so engrossed in my own mind that I forget there are other people around and that these people are attempting to talk and interact with me, which unfortunately leads to me ignoring a lot of people all the time (sorry!). Maybe I really am crazy and this is just the longest dream ever or I think way too much about insignificant things that shouldn't bother me. I have had some pretty vivid dreams that when I woke up couldn't be sure if they actually happened in my sleep or when I was awake which got me started on this new theory of mine. For all I know I could be strapped to a bed in a straight jacket under heavy medication in some insane asylum instead of sitting at my computer typing this out. Maybe I will find out one day but if my theory is right I would rather go on believing that this isn't a dream and it is in fact reality but who is to say what reality is maybe we are all asleep somewhere and dreaming this world together kind of like the matrix? Oh well I'm gonna stop now before I do end up medicated somewhere.

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